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Sunday, September 12, 2010



trees reflected in river

On the Pere Marquette River
This was the view today as I crossed the bridge over the Pere Marquette River. I went for a bike ride, and headed south for a ways and then came back. There aren't too many bridges over the river, so if I go south I either have to make a BIG loop, or just turn around. It's interesting that it's mid-September and everything is still green.

On Life
I managed to offend someone today. Now, don't be nice and tell me that it must have been an accident, that I didn't mean it. No, I didn't mean to do it, but it happened. It happened because I fired off an email to this person without thinking very carefully about how they might react. This is a well-documented fault of mine. What I said was true, but I didn't say it very well.

Fortunately, the person told me that I upset them, so I had a chance to try to apologize. I hope that I said I was sorry well enough. I did get one response that seemed calmer, but not a definite ok. I suspect sometimes people just don't respond, but go on indefinitely being mad at me.

I've had all afternoon to think about this. My intent is rarely to be harsh, but I'm often perceived this way. (Believe me, when I mean to be harsh, no one mistakes it for anything else.) I'm usually more concerned about having things be right than about how other people feel, and every once in a while, like today, I need a smack up the side of the head to be reminded that I should think more before I talk or write.

If there is a good thing that came out of this, it is that I finally got around to writing a letter to someone whom I think I really did hurt a couple of years ago. It's ready to go in the mail tomorrow.

Sigh... person still under construction here.


rainfield61 said...

Reflection... is important.

John | Daily Photo said...

I speak before I think far too often and cause myself no end of trouble :-(

VanillaSeven said...

Don't be too hard to yourself. We only human to make mistakes.

Auntie E said...

I know that e-mail saga. I have been known to come across like that. Now I seldom send emails out. They do not allow for the tone in ones voice of words. I too get that.. I thought you were mean, and from my own family! so now I'm trying to be more of a listener than a speaker to folks. Reflection is great and the learning curve never ends. Hope your friends sees your heart and not just your words.

Secondary Roads said...

Been there. Done that. Friends forgive--eventually.

Ann said...

don't feel bad, I have a habit of doing the same exact thing. I'm still under construction too :)

spinninglovelydays said...

I think we're all guilty of that. Your edge is that you're aware of your wrong and are willing to make amends. Sadly, not everybody's the same. Hope things turn out okay for you and your friend in the end.

Jean said...

Communicating though email can be confusing and foster misunderstandings for the reasons you mentioned. You did apologize and explain... so the ball is in your friend's court.
I hope your letter is well received!

Ditto on the previous comments.:)

Sharkbytes said...

Thanks, everyone. I think I'll respond in one comment, because so many of you shared that you have done the exact same thing. Sometimes communication is SO difficult, isn't it? Auntie... I still like communicating in writing, because it usually means that I take some time before I shoot off my mouth. I think I make fewer faux pas that way!

Yes, the person emailed me again. I think all is well.

RNSANE said...

I'm guilty of the same, Shark...more times than I like to admit. I've been the recipient, as well, and I usually say nothing to the offender. I just feel bad and let things smoulder which isn't good, either.

By the way, thanks for mentioning my book in your listmania list on Amazon. I appreciate that very much.

Emm said...

I can definitely offend when I want to and I can be the most evil, nasty, horrid girl. I manage 99.99% of the time to rein it in and control it but every now and then I can let some of it out at The Husband. He has learned to just laugh at me, thankfully.

miadventure said...

Ugh, I love to fly fish the PM. Your blog is very cool as it showcases the area where I come from. Thanks for bringing a little bit of my home, where I still adventure, to me while I am away at school!

I am heading out on a trip to Maine in a few weeks. Please follow my adventure as I blog from McDonald's free wifi.

take care and keep up the awesome blogs.

ps the NCT blog is awesome too, just started to follow it!


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