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Wednesday, July 8, 2009

You know you are a long-distance hiker ...


feet with black toenails

...when four of your toenails are black– only four, because three of the others already fell off.

...when you choose to eat cold meals for days rather than carry an 11 oz. stove

...when the syllable MOOS means a large mammal and not a hair gel

...when you are pretty sure that two pair of underwear is plenty for a week

...when you buy extra moleskin and baby powder and skip the toothpaste

...when a “zero” is a day off not a loser, and a “nero” is a near-zero day, not a Roman emperor

...when ibuprofen is your favorite appetizer

...when the phrase “beaver activity” strikes more terror in your heart than “traffic jam”

...when clean hair is something you dream of, and television is a distant memory

...when contour lines and fall lines mean more to you than age lines

...when you have to sleep on the porch when you get home because the bedroom is too stuffy

Bed is Too Small

Bed is too small for my tiredness.
Give me a hill topped with trees.
Tuck a cloud up under my chin.
Lord, blow the moon out, please.

Rock me to sleep in a cradle of dreams.
Sing me a lullaby of leaves.
Tuck a cloud up under my chin.
Lord, blow the moon out, please.

West Pike Lake

West Pike Lake, North Country/Border Route Trail, Minnesota Arrowhead
See A Major Hiking Goal Decision
See Hiking the Minnesota Arrowhead


betchai said...

this is hilarious Sharkbytes :) oh and i love that poem, i love the lullaby of leaves and water.

Rick (Ratty) said...

I'm not a long distance hiker, yet. This is pretty funny, but it will probably scare off a lot of potential hikers. Not me though. I can already identify with some of that. This was a fun one.

North Country Trail said...

I always have enjoyed your blog. Thank you for sharing some of your adventures with us.
Mark Lindsay
Kingsley, Michigan

rainfield61 said...

You have one of the best posts that I love so much. Interesting and hilarious.

Glynis Peters said...

Oh what a fun post! I love the poem but you can keep the foot pic :)

Lyghtekeeper said...

I still remember a summer when we came up and I ASKED to sleep out on your back porch. I loved it - beautiful sky at night, sounds of birds in the morning and fresh air. I'm sure I couldn't do that anymore but the memories still make me smile.

brokenteepee said...

You sound like the male person. He loves to hike. He was most proud of his hike to the bottom of the Grand Canyon. He did lots of practice hikes for it. The publicist likes the peace and quiet. Although her health problems keep her from hiking much. She did get to the bottom at Canyon de Chelley.

spinninglovelydays said...

It sounds like a wonderful lifestyle. Love the poem too. :)

North Country Trail said...

Great sight I look forward to all the interesting stuff you post

Julia said...

FABULOUS! Loved this post. LOL funny. And the poem is wonderful in its self.

Sharkbytes said...

Betchai- If you like it, I know other hikers will "get" it too! The poem is actually a song from Scout camp long ago, but it remains one of my all-time favs. Maybe my theme song.

Hi Ratty- well, very few people are willing to try the long-distance hiking thing anyway. If this scares 'em they probably shouldn't be trying it. The reality is much dirtier and crazier.

Mark- Hey, welcome! I hadn't seen your blog before. I'll link it from the NCTnews one. Thanks! The whole Arrowhead hike was lovely with views like that.

Rainfield- Yes, you too, know about the hiking. Once in a while I manage some humor!

What, Glynis? You don't want feet like that? Where's your sense of adventure?

Priscilla- hi there! I think you are related to the talented leaping goat that looks like a Holstein. He is gonna whip all of the rest of us at Chuck’s place. Go Harry!

Hi Spinning- thanks for coming by. I put in all my time with little ones as you are doing now, but this is how I choose to spend my earned “free” time!

Julia- That’s rare praise coming from a great humorist. Nice to see you here.

Dawn said...

Meandering through your blog and I saw my toes! Kilimanjaro, Fish River Canyon, the Annapurna Circuit, have all left their mark on these poor digits but what wonderful memories! I really enjoyed your blog and will be back for more.